Sunday, April 26, 2009

dear husband.

in honor of earth day, and in the attempt to save a tree ...
i've decided to give my husband his "dear husband" letter (which sounds like it could be a lot like a dear john letter ... but isn't.) on this here blog. feel free to comment and give him some additional advice as you see fit. i'm sure he'll appreciate it.

dear husband ...

thank you. thank you for agreeing to watch the girly-girls for a few days, while i run off and pretend to be some kind of expert speech-language pathologist. in front of a lot of people. in a new fancy outfit.

because, while i know that it's your duty as a parent ... to, um ... parent ... in the absence of the OTHER parent ... it's a daunting task. to be on your own ... for several days and nights. outnumbered. i know. believe me ... i know.

but ... i promise ... it's hard. but ... oh-so-fun. in the end ... i'm pretty sure that you will look back on these few days and remember how much fun you had ... getting to be the part-time single parent for a few days.

(and if all goes swell? maybe this will become a more regular occurence ... and then you don't have to look back on THIS time as a fond memory ... but you can look back on these mommy getaway weekends as fond memorIES.)*

here is some advice. take it or leave it. or make up your own ... 'cause that's probably going to work out better for you in the end anyways. ...

  • stripes and polka dots ... don't match.
  • unless stella has dressed herself. then ... whatever she picks ... matches.
  • seriously ... don't fight that fight.
  • dresses/skirts = no crying episodes before 8 am.
  • jeans = minimal crying before 8 am.
  • pants = much crying before 8 am. (especially if YOU are wearing a skirt ... but ... i'm thinking this isn't going to be a problem for you.)
  • tell stella and cora how much i love them.
  • kids eat 3 times per day (unless they are at daycare ... then it's 2 times).
  • dog eats 2 times per day.
  • cats eat 1 time per day.
  • except for jazzy ... who gets breakfast.
  • don't let skye off the line without watching her. a wise woman once told me that labradors like to roll on baby bunny nests. save the bunnies.
  • by the way ... there was a big bunny-rabbit by the garden the other night ... be careful when clearing out that pile of leaves. more bunnies maybe? save the bunnies.
  • if your choice is to clean or to play? pick play. (i can help clean when i get home).
  • don't serve wild rice with spaghetti.
  • don't serve pierogies with potato chips.
  • call me. everynight.
  • if the girls are tired ... they go to sleep MUCH faster. a game of tag before bath ... always helps. unless it's raining. ah ... screw it ... i'm pretty sure a game of tag in the rain would be fun too.
  • don't get frustrated at bedtime.
  • if you expect it to take 15 minutes ... it will take 2 hours. if you give yourself 2 hours ... it might take 15 minutes.
  • kiss my girls and tell them how much mommy loves them.
  • read three books with stella.
  • unless you want to look like the rockstar parent ... and make me suffer just a little bit when i get back ... then read 4 or more.
  • use her music. really. it helps her fall asleep.
  • if cora wakes up around 11 ... walk quickly (and quietly) into her room and pop that nuk-nuk back in.
  • if she is sitting up and mumbling something incoherent ... help her lay back down ... cover her up with her blanket ... and pat her. she'll be out in 10 seconds.
  • cheers! here's to hoping they sleep all night for you! (it's awesome when they do!)
  • in the morning? cuddle them.
  • and remind them how much their mama loves them.
  • polka dots and stripes ... don't match ... usually ...

again. thank you. i'm sure i'm appreciating it. truly.
but i'm sure i'm also missing you guys a ton already. i'll try to enjoy myself. don't worry.

love (the love of your life) ... mommy.

* but next time ... i'm totally going somewhere fun. without a schedule. and with an accompanying book. (that is totally not a children's book.) and more camera time for me. so maybe somewhere tropical?
dear girly-girls.

listen to daddy. have fun. pay attention. have good attitude. be silly. pick up your toys. call mommy. cora - don't hit friends. it's owie. be sweet like honey. and stella - you can be beautiful in pants too. fashion doesn't require dresses. mostly just remember how much i love you. i'll be home soon.

because i love you ... a lot. to the moon ... and back.

as big as the universe. forever and ever. and round like a circle ... always.

kisses and hugs.

love ... mommy.


Sprite's Keeper said...

So sweet! I think you got it all.
Have fun!

Casey said...

Woah, you're big time now! Good luck with your conference, you'll do great.

I might print out your list for my husband if it's ok. Actually, the part about dresses might not fly for Graham.

Anonymous said...

You are completely amazing and wonderful and I've just spent an hour reading through some of your blog (an hour that should have been spent doing washing) but i know which i enjoyed more:) i found you through Sheye's blog in case you're wondering who this crazy Australian fan is.....Hope you have a lovely day:) vanessa

Unknown said...

Great list! He can do it!! One of my favorite things when I go away on business trips is when people ask who is taking care of the kids....I'm always like..."Their father. He's perfectly capable." Everyone always seems so surprised! The only thing that really stresses him out is doing Olivia's's not good.

Shangrila said...

Have a great (successful) trip-loved your list, especially where it says that if Stella picks her outfit, it automatically matches! I'm sure your honey will cover everything beautifully until your return. :)

P.S. Do you want MY bunnies?! I'm not as kind as you are, and I have been known to be decidedly um...ANTI-bunny. Because those hungry little buggers keep trying to eat my plants. :(

Keely said...


*takes notes* "Save...the...bunnies..."

He'll find his stride. You have fun.

anymommy said...

This is so sweet and funny. Have fun. Don't worry about them too much, polka dots and stripes don't look that bad together and Dads always get a little slack ;-)