Tuesday, December 23, 2008

request.



this is why my heart hurts today.

coconut is sitting on my lap as i write this request to you ... and she just smiled and pointed as that picture appeared above. "gramma!" she said. and i start crying again ... she asked if i "bump head?" no baby ... mama's heart is very very sad.

see that amazingly wonderful woman up there?

yesterday, in the middle of the night, she had a fall. she (finally) realized the importance of these episodes and got ahold of one of her beloved children. who, in turn, called an ambulance to bring her in right away.

now we have a diagnosis.

brain tumor.

which will potentially be operated on ... today. edit: maybe not today. but soon.

and i am desperately begging you for all of the prayers and thoughts and well-wishes that you can possibly muster up today ... to pull her through this. because i am NOT ready to see her go.

it's amazing how something like this, can help you to realize the true importance of a holiday.

it's not the hours spent searching for a perfect present, the gifts that you receive under your tree or the cookies ... it's the people that you love. fully and truly. it's having them around you. it's being enveloped in one of gramsy-bear's best hugs.

so, please? send her some well wishes if you can today ...
i know this sounds greedy ... but i really want her here. i cannot imagine my life without her in it.

that, and ... she has a lot of life to live still.

in fact, she's been asking when they can get that thing out of her ... because she has a casserole in the fridge that needs to be brought over to someone's house ... and someone else asked her to make mashed potatoes for christmas dinner.

so, see? she's not ready yet either.

17 comments:

little.birdy said...

Sending up prayers for grandma.

Cpt. J's Wife said...

Sending prayers her way.

Marinka said...

I'm sending prayers and all the good thoughts your way and your grandmother's way. Take care of yourself too.

Kelly said...

I'm so sorry! My heart hurts too for u!! Saying big prayers!! xoxo HUGS!!

Cristina Mathers said...

prayers your way. so sorry. hang in there.

Sprite's Keeper said...

Wishing her the best with all that I am..

For Myself said...

I am thinking of you and your loved ones ~ sending you healing thoughts and peace.

Casey said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandma, I'm sending good vibes her way.

KJ said...

I giggled a little when I read the part about the food, thats totally what my grandma would say!!!

Thoughts and prayers coming your way!!!

Connie Weiss said...

Prayers and positive thoughts for Grandma!

Keep us posted please....

steenky bee said...

Oh, honey. I'm so glad I stopped by today. Just on whim I logged on to wish my friends in blog-world a Merry Christmas, well, at least that was why I THOUGHT I logged on. But after reading this, I know that I logged to to read this beautiful post so that I can add Grandma in my prayers. Hugs from me. I'll count her and you in my prayers. Keep us posted.

jen said...

wow. thanks everyone. we're feeling it here. i really appreciate it.
tomorrow, i promise an update. now, i'm too tired.
must. sleep.
or at least, make an attempt.

Trailing Mira said...

Jen, Lots of positive thoughts and energy being sent your/her way. Please do keep us updated. You can tell from that photo what a big soul she has.

Allison said...

I pray that she will be alright. It sounds like she is a tough lady. Stay positive. I will be thinking of you throughout the holidays.

Laufa said...

Oh Sweetie, my heart hurts for you too. Your family will be in my prayers.

PsychMamma said...

Thinking of all of you and sending her (and you too) buckets and buckets of well wishes.

TRB Holt said...

Jen,

I am sending healing thoughts to you and your family.

Happy New Year!

Terri