Saturday, July 26, 2008

the pitch at which my brain ceases to function

coconut is a screamer.
not just a little scream here and a little scream there. she is a SCREAMER.

"mommy..."
"MOMMY..."
"!!!***!!MOMMY!!***!!!"

today in a restaurant, she noticed a group of guys...and she latched on to the one that actually responded to her repeated "hi" requests. she thought she was freaking hilarious when she was saying "hi" to him over and over and over. poor guy. and he thought he was just being nice.

then...she realized that the place ECHOED-echoed-echoed-echoed...

i could not stop her from screaming. i tried the phone. i tried the keys. i tried handing her a cookie. i handed her a glass of coke. nothing...so, we left.

right before getting married, we had a family member (hi!) that at the time, had a son around this age. we were going to be in town one night and asked if they wanted to meet out for dinner. they said that they didn't take him out to eat and suggested that they could make something at their house. i distinctly remember rolling my eyes and thinking..."what's up with that? i will NEVER forgo a dining out experience just because i have a little kid." (weren't we all better parents before we actually HAD kids?)

now...i totally understand. i COMPLETELY understand.

currently, the worst of it... is in the car. she has this pitch that she can hit at a moment's notice if...sheisnotrespondedtorightaway.

i swear to god...my brain ceases to function when she reaches that level of scream.

i can't see the road. i can't remember what someone was telling me. i can't remember how i got there and who i am. all i know...is that there is a animalistic noise coming from immediately behind me. maybe, this is what happens during the fight/flight response you hear about in nature? maybe, everything ceases to function and you have to instinctually perform your fight/flight response?

apparently i don't have those options as a mommy. legally, i can't knock her silly...or...jump out of the car and run. those would be labeled as abuse or abandonment. and i'm pretty sure that would equal jail time for mommy.

and on a totally unrelated - but somewhat related note...
(mom - why were we talking about me going to jail??)
whatever...my mom mentioned something to belly about me going to jail...i'm sure it was in relation to needing to follow rules (or something totally appropriate like that)...belly said it wouldn't be a problem...'cause daddy can put her to sleep.

apparently...i am completely dispensable.

p.s. sar-bear...ignore this post. don't let the husband read this post. can coconut and i come and visit in a week or so?
p.s.s.why do i feel the need to write "don't read this" es on my posts? maybe it WAS better thinking that no one was actually reading my blog.

7 comments:

Alice said...

For some strange reason, my Boy can hit some REALLY high notes too. Can't wait for a voice change in his teens. : )

Christy said...

Porgie isn't a screamer - thank the lord. However, we went out to eat the other night, and she refused to sit in a highchair or drink from her sippy cup. She cried until we let her sit in a regular chair, with a regular cup. Kids are a pain in the ass.

Angela said...

HAHAHA reminds me if the time we took my son to Denny's. He was 2 and decided to play with the blings. Daddy told him to stop or get a butt spanking. That precious angel of ours screamed in this high pitched voice "DONT'T SPANK MY ASS DADDY". I think he might have destroyed a few Miracle Ears that day.

Kelle said...

thanks for your suggestions on the cards! laughing at how you tell your husband to stop reading. love it!!! love all that you are doing with your photos too! HAVE FUN!!!

Insta-mom said...

Last night, I reeeeally wanted to go out to dinner. So The Hubs and I talked about it and he asked, "Do you really want to do dinner? Out? With the three of them?"

Sigh. We stayed home.

As far as the back of the car...there have been times when I haven't been able to even take the breath to answer before the "Mommy. MOMmy. MOMMY." starts. I'm with you, sister.

Connie said...

Ha! If Sara won't let you stay at her house you can stay at mine and Coconut and 'Alex' can scream together!

We still take our kids out. I figure we won't ever see these people again and it gives them something to talk about.

And to the poor guy at Thaifoon that had to clean up all of the rice from under our table. Sorry!

phulmaya said...

Love your blog!
I can't help with the car situation but I have a completly politically incorrect solution for the restaurant - when we go out to eat and want to enjoy ourselves we take my Iphone and my son watches Dora while he mindlessly stuffs food in his mouth. Hubby and I talk, H views, all are happy. Portable DVD player works just as well..