i {heart} little faces.

and little toes. 
and little people. 
and little fingers.
and button noses.
and that super soft wispy hair on top of a newborn's little perfectly scented head ...

another i heart faces challenge ...

let them be little.

one of my favorite little pictures this year. 

2 little faces.  20 little toes.  2 little {perfectly different but so kinda the same} people.  2 button noses.  2 little heads of wispy hair.

i swear.  is there anything cuter than two babies in a bowl?

check out i heart faces for more little peoples this week. 

impromptu puppet show and just how much i truly love my kids.

we had a kind of sort of planned (like yesterday) birthday party at my house today.
my grandma is turning 91 tomorrow.

91.

holy goodness.

and we celebrated in the gorgeousness that is (apparently) fall in minnesota.  80-something degree temps.  beautiful blue skies.  no raindrops (though the forecast a few days ago had predicted oodles of raindrops ... thank you for being wrong dear forecasters.)  we had a lovely lunch outside.  we crunched through the leaves that i didn't bother to rake up.  we quietly manuevered our circle of chairs and wheelchairs and walkers into a new patch of shade every so often.

it was nice.

and then the girly-girls pulled out the final straw for making it a perfect day.

they delighted us with a puppet show.

finners pulled up the best seat in the house.  no one fought him for it.

i think it was titled the "mouse and the gorgeous dance by stella and cora olson."  there was something about a mouse.  and a hunter.  and the hunter was hungry.  and the mouse was going to do a dance ... but never did.  and that's pretty much where the show stopped.  but in it's own way continued on.  and on.  and on.

though none of us were really paying attention. 

finn saw a plane.  (i love that he's still in the "hi daddy!" plane stage.)

my 90 years and 364 days old grandma got bored and asked to be brought home. 

and it didn't really matter what the play was about or what was actually happening ... because it was a moment.  a blip in the time of my life that will never happen just as perfectly again.  there may not be the same characters or audience.  at any given point in the next day or year or decade ... there will be people that are no longer with us.  and there will be bigger girly girls that are less interested in performing and much more interested in boys.  and make up.  and their cell phones.

stella so politely curtsied.
and cora took a bow. 

in the only way that my cora would.  (notice the mismatched shoes, and the belt.) 

and i realize ... now ... looking back ... that i'm so happy that i stopped this moment. 

fall mini sessions at jennifer liv photography

just in case you are local and interested in having family portraits in the near future! 

please email me if you are interested ...

i would love to help your family capture some wonderful fall memories!
jenniferlivphotography@hotmail.com

on this day. this is who you are.

you.

 you are my heart little finners.
it amazes me and gets away from me ... obviously (i'm a bit late on this post) ... how old you are getting.  you. are. my. baby.  you are supposed to stay that way forever and ever and a day ... and you aren't. 
you are.
but you aren't.

and it kills me just a little bit on the inside because i can't stop time.  i can't make you stop and stay where you are and then i feel guilty for wishing that i could. 

what i can do, though?
is ...  i can write.
i can hold this exact moment on our page of history and i can tell everyone who you are ... but i can also flip back to this moment someday down the road when you are really big and grown and you ask me for the car keys and you know how to actually put them into the ignition and then you know how to start the car and then you drive away.

on that day ... i will pull this memory out and i will sob and remember who you were.

this?  is who you are ... today.
you are 1 1/2 years old ... and then some.
you have twinkles of trouble in your bright blue eyes.
you love your family.
lots.

your sisters are your lifelines.  without them you would crumble.  you want to be with them always.
you are a mama's boy. 
i'm not sure if that has to do with the fact that you still nurse.  um.  all the time.  and you have just begun to slide yourself off my lap saying all done ... and run off to join the girly-girls.
you are a daddy's boy.
you are enamored with anything and everything that he is doing.  you want to be a part of all of it.
and oh-my-god ... he pushes you too high on the swings. 
but you never want mama to push you.
hmmm.

you climb.
anything.
boxes and beds.  stairs and ladders. 
and you're fast.  super fast.

you love to put on everyone's shoes.  pink.  slippers.  ANYTHING.  and you trot around in them as best you can.

you color.  you always start on paper ... and then move to the table. and then chair.  and then hopefully i catch you before you make it to the walls.  or floor. 
you are also amazingly specific about what you are drawing.  what looks like scribbles across a page to me ... is a dog.  or a kitty.  or a tree.  to you.  i should really get better at guessing.

you count ... everything.
wah.  tu.  fee.  foh.  fai. and on and on and on.
sometimes you get to 5.  and go to 8.  and then back to 7.  and then 8.
sometimes you get all the way to 13.  or 14.
i think you forget that you are ONLY one.

oh. wheels.
you are in love with anything with wheels ...
bus?  beep beep.
truck?  ("tuk") honk honk.
train?  ("choochoo") i'm not quite sure how you make the exact sound of a train.  but you do.
tractors?  ("TAHCTOHS!!!!!!") yes.  they are really talked about with THAT much enthusiasm.
boat?  no wheels.  but transportation ... so it still counts.
ambulance?
firetruck?  ("weeooo weeooo")
motorcycle? ("cyco")
bike?  ("bite??  bite??")
helicopter?  ("coptoh")
airplane?  ("pane")

i wish i could remember your first words ... but similar to your sisters ... as soon as the words spilled ...they tumbled and there was virtually no distinguishing first words from lists of words.  they were just there.

you throw with either hand.
you love to swing and slide.
you say peez.  and tah-too.
you hit your head against the floor.  ground.  wall.  if you are frustrated.  (thankfully this is quickly disappearing as your vocabulary is quickly growing).

you seem to be allergic to red dye #40.  though that is strictly a guess at this point. 
you have spent the past week in multiple stages of hives spread across your body.
you got hives.
so we gave you benedryl (recommended by a dr.).
and you worsened.
and then i realized that benedryl has red dye #40 in it.  poor guy.

you love elmo.
and dora.
and george.

you love to read books.  in your chair.  in your room
or with someone.
as long as they are about trucks.  or tractors. 

you love spending time with your people.  boppa.  and grandpa.  grandma kristi and grandma jeanna.  you love all of them with your whole heart.  and you will gladly leave mama or daddy to go to them.  unless you want to nurse.  then no one is better than mama.
though you do think it's really funny to request num nums from anyone. 

i'm realizing very quickly that you are just about to turn two.
two.
ohmyword.
two.
and the girly-girls were weaned at two.
and i just am not sure that i can do that again.  i failed miserably at weaning cora.  expecting her to do the same as her big sis.  when i really should have stopped and realized that they are two VERY different peoples.  and that you are too.
so i think we'll probably just take it ... at our own pace.  k?
though i would really appreciate sleeping approximately 6 hours in a row sometime in the very near future, ok?

i love you little finnamon.
we all do.
you are a superb addition to this little family of ours. 
we never knew you ... never dreamed of you ... never thought in a million years that there would be a boy in our lives.
and then you were there.  here.
and we wouldn't change it for the world.
our little blue caboose.

favorite summer face.

seriously.  not sure that i can possibly pick a most absolutely favorite ... but this comes close.  this boy. 

my heart is had.

this summer was amazing watching him grow up into this little man with thoughts and ideas and likes and dislikes and all that jazz.

he's most definitely a boy (with a twinkle of trouble in his eye) and the sweetest heart you ever did meet.

and is currently covered in a bajillion hives.  so, that's fun.

i surely love you finners.

head on over to i heart faces to see more summer favorites ... it's people's choice this week! 

sun. shine.

there's this to do and that to do.

and i sit here.  gazing at this photo.  because it's my sunshine.  in action.  totally and completely being her. 
and she's not here.

gah.  it's taking some getting used to ... this whole kid in preschool thing.  with another in elementary school.  and another that occasionally blesses his mama with a nap for a few hours in the afternoon.

and i feel so lucky to get to experience this while working part time. 

i feel like a mom.

isn't that weird?  i haven't totally wrapped my brain around that ... it's me.  i'm well aware of that ... i know that my heart rests outside of my body in these three beautiful children and i love them so amazingly.  but ... i'm a mom.  i have to get people dressed and out the door.  i have to look out for them and take care of them and i can't just abandon ship and run free.

nor would i want to.

though i still dream of a weekend eating pizza alone while watching a chick flick in a bed. 

blah blah blah.

my girl.

allowing me (last fall ... i can't believe this was last fall already) to practice sunflare.  and she tipped and the sun shone through her arm while she made the silliest face.

her.

 if you are lucky enough to KNOW her ... you know that this is her.  SO. HER.

check out i heart faces for more a touch of sun entries this week.
enjoy!

everyday beauty.

trying to find the beauty in the everyday ...

in between the teeny leftover pile of macaroni and cheese ... a half eaten cucumber ... a plastic kids fork and the can of coke that i treated myself to (after having given up soda for a good two weeks, now.)

thinking about things and how they change things and leave me uncertain ...

thinking about the copier room i was in 10 years ago watching a tiny black and white screen while awful things happened ... thankful that jeremy wasn't flying that day and that i knew exactly where he was. 

i felt really uncertain that day too.

there.

there it is ... the beauty in the everyday bouquet of flowers from my mom and the girly girls.  stella had no idea how much i love irises.  my mom told her to grab a sunflower for me.

beauty.  in between the mac and cheese and the uncertainty.